Jonny McCambridge: The teenage years begin - the next step on the parenting journey

May 27, 2026 - 10:22

Very, very, very occasionally I meet, on my travels, a fan of this column. It is a rare and startling event, like spotting a hedgehog in broad daylight or finding a ten-pound note in a coat pocket from last winter. The conversation usually follows a predictable script. They say they enjoy the writing, and I mumble something awkward about being grateful. Then, almost without fail, they ask the same question: "How are the kids doing now?"

The answer, as of late, is that we have entered a new country. The border was crossed without ceremony. One morning, my eldest child was a child. The next, they were a teenager. There was no fanfare, no official proclamation. Just a subtle shift in the atmosphere, like the pressure change before a storm. The bedroom door, once always open, is now frequently closed. The music coming from within is louder, more insistent, and entirely incomprehensible to me. Conversations that used to be a river of endless questions have become a series of grunts, sighs, and single-syllable answers.

I am learning the new rules. I must knock before entering. I must not offer advice unless it is explicitly requested, which it never is. I must accept that my taste in everything from clothes to music to food is, apparently, a source of profound embarrassment. It is a strange and humbling experience to be demoted from all-knowing parent to a sort of tolerated landlord who provides food and wifi. I am told this is normal. I am told it is a necessary part of growing up. But knowing that does not make the silence at the dinner table any less heavy, or the sudden, unexplained moods any less confusing. The journey has simply taken a sharp turn, and I am still trying to find my footing on this new, rocky path.